Trigger ...

  Trigger

The word "trigger" triggers me.  I can't stand it.  Seriously.  As a therapist that works a lot with  eating disorders and substance abuse, I hear it wayyyy too much.  I constantly hear "that's triggering" or "don't be triggering" or "that triggered me" or "you shouldn't say that, it could trigger someone."

What does "trigger" even mean? According to dictionary.com, "trigger" has the following definitions:

1.  to initiate or precipitate (a chain of events, scientific reaction, psychological process, etc.):

2. to become active; activate.

3.  anything, as an act or event, that serves as a stimulus and initiates or precipitates a reaction or series of reactions.

To me, these definitions sound a lot like emotional responses.  Essentially, that is what a "trigger" is.  It's an emotion. It's a thought. It's an opportunity.  It's something that we hear or see that causes an emotion in us.  What do emotions do? They tell us to act or respond a certain way.  

I feel that people blame reactions on triggers.  "He triggered me, so I acted out." No, you had an experience and an emotional reaction that caused a behavior.  

We NEED to be triggered.  I may get some pushback from others in my field with this position, but I stand firmly behind it.  We demonize and moralize certain behaviors.  I feel that this could possibly contribute to the stigma of eating disorders, addiction and mental health issues.  

I remember working with a young lady who suddenly exclaimed in a family session, "Don't say 'meatball' around me! It's triggering!!!"  I just stopped and looked at her and said "It triggers you to do what?"  She had no response.  I honestly don't think she was even aware of the point she was trying to get across to her parents.  Where do we draw the line between an opportunity to explore an urge, feeling or situation and mainstream conversation? I should add that I would LOVE to hear from my colleagues with their thoughts on this... it's one I've really struggled with over the years as I feel it can just contribute to the secrecy and shame about unhealthy behaviors related to addiction and eating disorders.  Of course, I am talking in the grays of this too, not an extreme and not minimizing or magnifying an issue or problem.  Simply acknowledging it.  At some point in life, everyone is going to hear about someone's activity habits, what they eat and be exposed to the names (at the very least) of drugs.  

When does a trigger become another way to avoid? Can we honestly expect ourselves to go around in a bubble never hearing words that may upset us or cause us to stop and reflect.  Again, we NEED to be triggered. (I promise I am NOT talking extremes here either!)  Situations will bring things up for us.  There are scenes in TV shows, books and movies that "trigger" me and a trauma I had a couple of years ago... but what it really means, is that it makes me think about what happened and I process it more.  I may get sad, I may cry, I may get angry.. but all of this needs to happen.  If I avoided being "triggered" I would never continue to process and work through my trauma.  

Again, I realize that this is NOT a black and white issue and I'd love to start a mindful dialog about this!  





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